Catching Up

It has been a long time since I last posted. Many things have changed. Rick and I never made it to dating. He ended up revealing to a female friend how much he liked me. She in turn told me. When we got around each other, the electricity was obvious to me and everyone else around us. It all was going well until a lady who is friends with our friends told him how much she liked him. It was as if she knew we liked each other and then went in for the kill. Then it all changed between Rick and I. It fizzled. Fast forward to now and they are engaged! The crazy part about all of this is that the same exact thing happened to me 4 years ago with another guy. It was the same exact situation. They got married quickly. I even went to the wedding. This last time with Rick stung a little and I retreated back into my shell and away from dating since April. I have been busy so there has not been much time to date. My job is more than full time and I enrolled back in school. I have really been enjoying school. I did go on one date recently which I will post about later.

Foot Fetish

Tonight I decided to log back into my online dating account. I had a few people email me while I was online. One in particular is 45, blonde hair, very attractive, and has a masters in Education. We emailed back and forth and had normal conversation. He then asked about my dating life and progressed to asking me if I am affectionate. I told him that I am affectionate. Then he asks me if my feet are cute and if I liked them played with!!! I was so shocked! The conversation was flowing in one direction and then he zeroes in on my feet! I asked him if he has a foot fetish. He said he does but not in a freaky way????!!!!!!! To each his own fetish but don't be asking me this stuff if I don't know you!!!! I emailed him back when he asked if I liked my feet played with and kissed and told him that I do not engage in this level of conversation with someone that I don't know. AAARRRGGG!

A Bowling Blast!

Lately, Rick has been finding reasons to talk to me. He will call, text, or email about something that would be easy for him to get the answer to. I think it is sweet. Tonight, I met up at a restaurant with Rick and some mutual friends. When I walked in, he came to me immediately and had me sit down with him. We went through some photos that I brought. We had some fun and flirty conversation. Later, we all went bowling. What a blast! He is a fantastic bowler! I talked a bunch of smack saying that I would beat everyone. I came in last place in the first game! Then I got better and came in 2nd for the last 2 games. He place 1st in all of the games. We had so much fun and bowled until after midnight. I think he purposely stayed around to be near me! Cute! I really think we could get serious. He is really into me.

He Called Me

Today I forwarded Rick an email that he needed to see and instead of responding by email, he called me. I think he used it as an excuse. We spoke for 2 hours and 45 minutes. We can relate to each other a lot. Our conversation ran deep. He is normally someone that goes to bed early so I was surprised to see him stay up this late!

Definite Connection

My feelings are confirmed. I saw him later today and he stopped me and said that he had so much fun talking to me and that he very much enjoyed it. Then he wanted to stay around me and we spoke for about 45 minutes after everyone else left. He gave me a hug later and said that my hair smelled nice. Later this evening, he sent me a text that thanked me for talking to him. He said that he is really enjoying getting to know who I am. Yay!

The Connection

Something crazy happened today. I have been totally focused on myself lately. I have not really paid much attention to men. Tonight, I felt a connection from a conversation with a man that I have known for a few years. His name is Rick. He is handsome and not really my usual type but he has a beautiful heart! A few months back, a lady told me that he had a crush on me. I told her to go and confirm it and the next day she told me that I was too intimidating for him. I was confused by it because she just said that he had a crush. I ignored it, pushed it aside and moved on. This brings me to today. When I have seen him lately, I pretend not to notice him unless he approaches me. Today he did approach me. All that we did was talk about a competition that my daughter is involved in and I left the conversation feeling warm fuzzies. It was like cupid shot me in the butt. I have thought about it ever since. It was definitely a connection.

Oh Well

Still feeling guilty about my rejection, I sent a text message to Steven thanking him for dinner and bowling. He did respond back and was nice but I think this is the last I will hear from him. It is probably for the best because I do not think we are compatible. I really want someone fun that can make me laugh and cut up with me. He has a little of that but I want someone that is a bit more bold. It is hard to explain.

No Kissing on the First Date

Since I started dating again coming up on 2 years now, I have had my share of many make out sessions on first dates. I grew tired of it around the end of 2008 so I made the decision that I would no longer kiss on the first date. If you think about it, it is weird to be swapping bodily fluids with strangers that you have known for such a short time. I love to kiss and it is a real intimate thing for me. Tonight I went on a date with Steven. He is a really nice guy. He is probably the nicest guy I have ever been out with from online dating. One issue that I have is that he is shorter then me. His profile says he is 5'6 but he is probably more along the lines of 5'5. This is something that I can get over because after a while, for the most part, I don't see the physical anymore. He has a very attractive face with dark eyes, dark hair, and big full lips. Just how I like it. He has been divorced over a year and has kids. He was a virgin until 26 years old when he married his wife. Since the divorce, he has had sex with 2 women. He has a job in sales management and seems to be well liked by many people. We went to dinner and had a great time. I was so nervous that I felt like I was having mild panic attacks as we were sitting at the table. My throat kept clinching up as I swallowed my food which made everything uncomfortable to me. Time for a drink I thought! So I ordered my favorite dirty martini. He does not drink. I really like it when a man drinks a little at least. It makes it all a little more fun. After dinner he extended the date and we went bowling. I had a great time. We had good conversation. He walked me to my car. I thought I could get by with just a hug but then he kissed me on my lips. I stopped him and told him I do not kiss on the first date. He asked me if I was a "rules girl". I said no, it is just my thing and not to take offense. This was the first time that I ever rejected a guy that I wanted to kiss so it was very awkward. It did feel funny with him being shorter than me when he leaned up to kiss me. I felt guilty about the rejection when I got in my car so I sent him a text with a photo of him bowling. He responded immediately to my text but now I have the feeling that I will never hear from him again.

Long Time No Post

Happy New Year! I have not posted since November. I took a little break. I have been real busy and focused on my goals. I have lost 6 more pounds since my last post. It really does come off slower as you get older! I have not been on many dates but I have talked to a few men. I met one man at the gym. Imagine that! Meeting a man at the gym...no makeup, sweaty, gym clothes! He is very cute but I am afraid our age difference is too much. We have been talking through email. I have dated much older men in the past but it did not work well so I probably will opt out of this one.

Austin pops in my mind all the time. I feel a sense of longing for him and it drives me crazy. My feelings for him intensify right around PMS so that may have something to do with it. I do want to see him again and can't wait until the day that I do. Something within me tells me that there is more to the story with him.